Aren't I Lucky…He Wore His “Fancy” T-Shirt Tonight

Recently I had the pleasure of going to one of the classiest establishments in the Dena to see an awesome live band with my girlfriends.  I know, right now you are saying to yourself, “there is a classy establishment in Pasadena…who knew”???  Well, of course there isn’t.  I, as always, am being completely facetious.  However, the band was rockin' so it was totally worth it. 

Whenever I go to places like this, my favorite thing to do while there is people watch.   Better yet, I like take in my surroundings and see what kind of men selection my ladies and I have at our fingertips.  Well, let me tell you….there was nothing on the menu that I wanted to have a taste of.  Why is that you ask???  Well, I am not a fan of guys in “fancy” T-shirts. 

Let mama give you her definition of “fancy” T-shirts, shall I?  First, a “fancy” T-shirt is known by many names.  Just to name a few…

1.       “Douche-bag cover”

2.       “DB moron poncho”

3.       “Douche-fag wrap”

4.       “I am a DB, Look at Me T”

5.       “The Situation on my shirt is ghey”

Examples of these types of “fancy” T-shirts include…..

Affliction; Tapout; Monarchy; Roar; Ed Hardy; Christian Audigier; True Religion; Hustler;

Anything with tattoos; Anything with tribal art; Anything with rhinestones; Anything with wings;

ANYTHING WITH WINGS (yes it’s so bad I have to list it twice)

The guys that I see wearing these types of shirts suffer from a common condition called douche-baggary.   Other symptoms of douche-baggary include (but are not limited to):  spiked hair, tribal tattoos, large (steroid enhanced) muscles, low IQ’s and dark tans.  Suffers spend the majority of their time club hopping, going the gym, watching combat sports such as UFC, talking a lot of shit and acquiring STD’s.  Wears also tend have a “god’s gift to woman” complex. 

Since these morons spend $100 on a shirt with a simple silk screen that should cost around $15, they should be avoided at all costs.  It is apparent that they have no self respect whatsoever. 

All joking aside….It is amazing to me that some woman actually swoon over these guys.  Never in a million years would I entertain a conversation with one of them in a bar, agree to go on a date with them, or allow them to even spend any time in my presence.  No offense guys, you could be the nicest person in the world, but you will NEVER get a chance if I see “wings” coming my way.

I am a woman in my 30’s.  I like to try and stay trendy when it comes to fashion, but I know what my limits are when it comes to dressing “age appropriate”.  I would not wear a mini shirt from 5-7-9 and think I could get away with it.  Obviously at my age, half tops are out as well.  I still manage to find things that still look hot or sexy but don’t make me look like a panther in 20’s attire. 

With this said, is it hard for some of you guys to find clothing that is age appropriate?  I think not!!!  I meet guys all the time to dress to impress.  “Fancy” T-shirts are not age appropriate for guys 25 or above.  As previously stated, my personal opinion is that they aren’t appropriate at any age. 

If you guys are single and looking for a good woman, please think about this when shopping for clothing….you only get one chance to make a first impression and you honestly can’t expect us to swoon over anything below.  Just mama’s opinionJ



Saw this one in person at Bamboo Bernies!!